Friday, May 30, 2008

THE UNKNOWN: Weezer - Weezer (Purple Album)

Tonight saw the last episode of LOST for the season. If you Tivo'd the show and for some reason haven't watched it, you have problems. And let me tell, reading this blog instead of watching the show is not a good excuse. I run this blog and I watched the show before sitting down. Heck, I think John McCain took time off from campaigning to watch the show (he has to watch something now that the Hills is on hiatus until the end of the summer). I don't want to talk about the big secret that was revealed at the end of this season, which was the big secret from the end of last season that they didn't reveal (don't ask). I don't want to talk about the terrible fake beard that they keep making Jack wear. Where did they get that thing? Did someone shave Tony Shaloub's head? I don't want to talk about how Sawyer mysteriously lost his shirt swimming to the island. Or that the Lawnmower Man has been reduced to flying helicopters (Poor Lawnmower Man). What I want to talk about is the Lost know, all the other people on the plane who get randomly killed off when they need a death. Like the red shirts in Star Trek. When Kirk, Mccoy, and Officer Buckley were going to an alien planet, it was pretty obvious who was getting whacked. Lost has their own red shirts, which happens to be the other survivors of the plane who have never been introduced. So here's the many of these no names are left? There were 70 survivors from both sections. Most of the 22 in the back were killed, leaving 52 total. we know of 28, leaving 24 expendable characters. Tonight saw roughly 12 more killed. And a lot have been killed in previous seriously...who the hell is now left on the island?

Weezer - Weezer (Purple Album)

1. My Evaline
2. Mykel & Carli
3. Susanne
4. Jamie
5. You Gave Your Love To Me Softly
6. Devotion
7. Waiting On You
8. I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams
9. Velouria (Pixies)
10. Christmas Song

Buy Weezer's new album...The Red Album...out Tuesday. I will post the second b-side album (Orange Album)...if and only if the Red Album goes to number one.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The 11 Best Weezer Songs:

I have a part-time on the city council. Yes, my city council position is only part-time. Partly because I'm not paid. Yet, they treat you like you're a full time employee. It's a thankless job filled with mostly 60 and over citizens who have nothing else to do with their lives but sit on a bench and bark about why their opinions are so much more insightful and accurate than anyone else's. Lately our attendance has been in the toilet. If I could drag 2 bums to come listen to the role call, I'd double the audience size. So I came up with this brilliant idea to get people in the door...we'd bribe them with free food. Currently, we were swimming in money. And one thing you should know about elderly folks...they hate spending money. Ironic, considering they should be spending their money as fast as possible before they die. I finally convinced them to hire the In-N-Out burger truck for a meeting. And guess what...hundreds of people showed up. It was our biggest showing...ever. Then a funny thing happened...all the council members who were crying about spending money on free food (and voted against it) were the first ones taking credit for the free food. Out in public, they were heroes. But behind closed doors...they did nothing but complain. Some didn't like the hamburger...where was the food for vegans? What about Kosher food? How come we got chips instead of fries? (In-n-Out doesn't deliver fries) And the best complaint, we had TOO many people.

During my entire service on the council...all the complained about was attendance. The second we got people there, they complained that there were too many people there and they were all there for the wrong reasons.

At this point, I'm quitting politics. It's too stressful to try to make everyone happy all the time, when no matter what you matter how helpful it pisses EVERYONE off.

Here are the 11 Best Weezer Songs:

1. The Good Life (Pinkerton)
2. Hash Pipe (Weezer Green)
3. Dope Nose (Maladroit)
4. Tired of Sex (Pinkerton)
5. This Is Such A Pity (Make Believe)
6. Keep Fishin' (Maladroit)
7. No One Else (Weezer Blue)
8. Butterfly (Pinkerton)
9. Photograph (Weezer Green)
10. Pink Triangle (Pinkerton)
11. You Gave Your Love To Me Softly (B-Side)

Weezer's The Red Album...will be released June 3rd. Pre-Order now!!!

Monday, May 26, 2008

The 11 Best Mudhoney Songs

Last week, I went to Disneyland with my daughter. Despite getting rained on like I was in the midst of a Biblical flood, we were not thrilled with Disney's rainy day policies. First, half the outside rides closed down. I understand that an act of nature is out of their control, but I still paid full price and should be compensated somehow...instead, Disney charges $8 for rain ponchos for its guests. Even though they are saving thousands of dollars by not not running certain rides...they still prefer to dig an extra few bucks out of their patrons.

But I think the most amusing thing about the day is the fact that It's A small World has been closed for renovations. The internet rumor is that Americans have grown so fat, that they are sinking the boats of Small world. The park needs to upgrade the ride to accommodate those passengers who have no self control. At first, I thought, why not have a weight restriction just like many rides that have height restrictions? People who are short have no control over their height and the park has no problem making rules against them. So why spend millions of dollars to change a ride because Tubby couldn't say no to the triple chili cheese burger...twice? One of my friends put it best...he know how much money Disneyland makes off fat people? Who do you think buys those turkey legs? Sadly, fat people may be Disney's most profitable customers, and if they're not happy...

Here are the 11 best Mudhoney songs:

1. Hate The Police (Superfuzz Big Muff)
2. Touch Me, I'm Sick (Superfuzz Big Muff)
3. Suck You Dry (Piece of Cake)
4. Thorn (Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge)
5. You Got It (Superfuzz Big Muff)
6. No End in Sight (Piece of Cake)
7. Deception Pass (Five Dollar Bob Mock Cooter Stew)
8. Baby, Dig That Light (Since We've Become Translucent)
9. FDK (My Brother The Cow)
10. Here Comes Sickness (Mudhoney)
11. Freak Momma (Judgment Night)

Buy Mudhoney's new CD, the Lucky Ones now.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

The 11 Best Songs By Green Day Members:

I saw this in the store today and was honestly horrified. I wasn't just horrified that someone thought that a Bling Bling Barbie would be a good idea and decided to make one. Nobody comes up with an idea for a toy and just makes it. It goes through rounds and rounds of market research. Hundreds of parents were consulted if they would buy this for their kids. Hundreds of kids were consulted if they wanted this toy. What horrifies me isn't that this ended up on the's when I think...what were the other toys that this product beat out? What other toys were so awful that My Bling Bling Barbie seemed like the best toy?

I weep for our kids.

The 11 Best Songs By Green Day Members:

1. Life During Wartime - Pinhead Gunpowder
2. Money Money 2020 - The Network
3. Song of My Returning - Pinhead Gunpowder
4. Supermodel Robots - The Network
5. Mechanical Man - Billie Joe Armstrong
6. 27 - Pinhead Gunpowder
7. Transistors Gone Wild - The Network
8. I Wrote Holden Caufield - Screeching Weasel
9. Roshambo - the Network
10. Big Yellow Taxi - Pinhead Gunpowder
11. Chocolate Rain - Tre Cool

Get the new Green Day album...I mean the new Foxboro Hot Tubs album...

Friday, May 16, 2008

The 11 Best Nine Inch Nails Albums:

Today, I saw a car with a bumper sticker that said..."powered by God." What the hell does that mean?

Does the car run on empty prayers and Hail Marys? Seriously...that's just a stupid bumper sticker. I may not be into the whole God scene...but at least I can respect (or understand) the little fishy. You're telling the world that you believe a blonde hair/blue-eyed savior was born to Jewish parents in the middle east. I get it. I don't agree with it...but I get it. But powered by the people who have this bumper sticker even get the irony?

Cars run on oil...gas...fossil fuels. Fossil fuels are made from dinosaurs. Dinosaurs are creatures that ruled the Earth millions of years ago until they all got fat and lazy and then went extinct.

Here's the paradox...according to Christianity and most religions, the Earth is only a few thousand years old...therefore negating the existence of dinosaurs...which would in turn negate the supply of fuel to their cars...that are "supposedly" powered by God.

Here are the 11 Best Nine Inch Nails Albums:

1. With Teeth
2. Broken
3. The Fragile
4. The Downward Spiral
5. Pretty Hate Machine
6. Y34rZ3r0R3M1x3d
7. Ghosts
8. Year Zero
9. And All That Could Have Been
10. Things Falling Apart
11. The Quake Soundtrack

Get Nine Inch Nails new album, The Slip....FOR strings attached.

Go here.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

THE UNKNOWN: Death Cab For Cutie - Uncharted Territory

I don't know if I'm fascinated by this or disturbed by it. Today I was out with my daughter and we noticed a woman at the park. This was a larger woman...she was somewhere between being big-boned and Roseanne Barr. Needless to say, she had larger breasts. All of sudden the strangest thing happened...her breast started vibrating. Jiggling if you must. But it wasn't both breasts, it was just one. I'll have to say that was odd...but now I was intrigued. Why in the world was this woman's breast jiggling for no apparent reason? Well, I was about to get my answer. The woman grabbed her shirt and shoved her hand into her own cleavage like she was inseminating a bull. The next thing I know, she's removed a cellphone, which she promptly answers. I was shocked...was she actually storing her cellphone in her bra? Who is she...Inspector Gadget? Well, seconds later, I was to get my confirmation, when she returned her cellphone to her bra. This was no college acid flashback. This woman was using her bra like an extra pocket on a pair of parachute pants. Then I pondered, what else is she keeping in there? Money? Keys? Make-Up? Chewing Gum? An Ipod? Lunch? And do I really want to know?

Buy Death Cab's new album...Narrow Stairs. It's well worth the money...I guarantee it!

Death Cab For Cutie - Uncharted Territory

1. Jealousy Rides With Me
2. Earth Angel (The Penguins)
3. Love Song (The Cure)
4. Talking Like Turnstiles
5. World Shut Your Mouth (Julian Cope)
6. Fortunate Son (CCR)
7. Rocking Chair (The Band)
8. Army Corps of Architects
9. This Temporary Life
10. Dream Scream (Daniel Johnston)
11. Christmas Baby (Please Come Home)
12. Spring Break Broke
13. Little Boxes

Note: Thanks for the help with the files!!!

Monday, May 12, 2008

The 11 Best Death Cab For Cutie Songs

Being successful at anything means you need to know what you're doing. Take for instance this weekend at the box office. Two titans fought it out between the Wachowski brothers with Speed Racer and Robert Downey Jr. with Iron Man. Iron Man, in its second weekend, pounded Speed Racer by 30 million. Iron Man has grossed 177 million in 10 days...Speed Racer will be lucky to gross 77 million in its entire run. How is it that the directors who brought you the Matrix, flopped so hard in their first new enterprise in over ten years? One thing: Jon Favreau. Behind the helm of Iron Man, is the writer-director Jon Favreau. The Wachowskis have one hit...The Matrix...a great film. But Favreau also had an impressive film on his resume...Swingers. Made for 1/1000 of the price of the Matrix, Swingers is equally important to 90s cinema. Favreau wrote the script. He also did the highly successful Elf...and the quiet indie classic, Made. What else do the Wachowskis have on their resume from the past 10 years? Just bad Matrix sequels.

Iron Man is movie based out character...we grow with Tony Stark...we feel his plight. We want him to win. Speed Racer is based out of visual style...after 15 seconds, we get it and are ready to move on with our lives.

Favreau has made a career of making good films...they may not break Box office records (until now), but they are always respectable. The Wachowskis got lucky once...and lightning doesn't strike twice.

Buy the new Death Cab For Cutie Narrow Stairs.

Here are The 11 Best Death Cab For Cutie Songs:

1. I Will Follow You Into The Dark (Plans)
2. Title Track (We Have The Facts)
3. Soul Meets Body (Plans)
4. Title and Registration (Transatlanticism)
5. 405 (We Have The Facts)
6. The Sound of Settling (Transatlanticism)
7. Someday You Will Be Loved (Plans)
8. Why You'd Want to Live Here (The Photo Album)
9. Marching Bands of Manhattan (Plans)
10. We Looked Like Giants (Transatlanticism)
11. Photobooth (Forbidden Love)

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The 11 Best Songs About Mom

Happy Mother's Day!!!!

The 11 Best Songs About Mom:

1. Dear Mama - 2pac
2. Mother - Pink floyd
3. Mother - Tori Amos
4. Mother - John Lennon
5. Mother - The Police
6. Mother's Day - Ezra Furman and the Harpoons
7. Hey Mama - Kayne West
8. Mother - Travis
9. Mother - Danzig
10. Mother - Goldie
11. Mother's Day - blink182

Friday, May 09, 2008

The 11 Best Roots Songs:

Some love him. Some hate him. Some think he's the greatest players in the NBA. Some believe he may someday be the greatest of all time. Some believe he's a role model. Some think he's rapist. Some think he's the kind of guy you want to bring home to your mother. Some think he's the kind of guy you don't want to leave alone with your younger sister. Some think he's a nice guy. Some think he's an asshole.

Whatever your impression is of Kobe Bryant. His impact on the world is undeniable. A 3-time NBA champion and most recently...Player of the Year. Because he can play ball unlike anyone else in the league...does that negate all the baggage that comes along with him? As long as the Lakers keep winning...then the answer is yes. If the Lakers were losing, then Kobe would be on the first flight to Oklahoma City.

In America, as long as your more talented than anyone around you...then you get a free pass to do anything you want. If Charles Manson had been a "good" singer...then he wouldn't be in prison right now. He would be the wacky aging rock star they'd wheel out at Grammy time to make a novelty appearance and do a guest spot with Rhianna. And people would love him. Don't believe me? Why do they still play Gary Glitter's "Rock N' Roll Parts 1&2" at ball games...even though he's a convicted child molester? Roman Polanski won best director. OJ Simpson is still allowed to buy kitchen knives. Rebecca Gayheart is still allowed to drive.

Here are The 11 Best Roots Songs:

1. What You Want (The Roots Come Alive)
2. The Next Movement (Things Fall Apart)
3. I Remain Calm (Do You Want More?!!!??!)
4. You Got Me (Things Fall Apart)
5. The Seed 2.0 (Phrenology)
6. Adrenaline (Things Fall Apart)
7. Don't Feel Right (Game Theory)
8. Don't Say Nuthin' (The Tipping Point)
9. Game Theory (Game Theory)
10. Tao of the Machine (Blade 2)
11. In The Music (Game Theory)

Buy the new roots album, RISING DOWN.

Friday, May 02, 2008

The 11 Best Tom Petty Songs:

I went to the store to buy the new Mudcrutch album. The cheapest I could find it was $11.99. I can't believe there's still some label out there who would push a first week CD for more than $9.99. Have they still not learned from the Napster years? So I went home and decided to buy it online for under $10. But before I bought it...I listened to it one more time...and didn't like it as much. Then I noticed that I could get Tokyo Police Club for only $9.00 with a bonus remix EP. I bought that instead.

Had Mudcrutch been $10 at the store...I would have purchased that...but greed got the best of the label and they lost a customer.

The 11 Best Non-Heartbreaker Tom Petty Songs:

1. Zombie Zoo (Full Moon Fever)
2. Ankle Deep (Highway Companion)
3. Runnin' Down A Dream (Full Moon Fever)
4. I Won't Back Down (Full Moon Fever)
5. Wildflowers (Wildflowers)
6. Yer So Bad (Full Moon Fever)
7. Saving Grace (Highway Companion)
8. I'll Feel A Whole Lot Better (Full Moon Fever)
9. Coming Back To You (Wildflowers)
10. Time To Move On (Wildflowers)
11. Don't Do Me Like That (Mudcrutch)

Buy Tom Petty's new album with his side-project, Mudcrutch.

Buy Tokyo Police Club's full-length debut.